I hope you enjoy Boss's Day by doing as little work as I do.

For Boss's Day I scheduled a full day of meetings about the same thing which will accomplish nothing.

Thanks for always being a shoulder I can accidentally throw up on.

I hope tonight's debate isn't so dull that I fall asleep before Obama does.

I'm well on my way to getting absolutely nothing done today.

Chair Saddle

England, 1890-1910

The Victoria & Albert Museum

Hieronymus Bosch, The Temptation of St. Anthony YOUR ARGUMENT IS...

Hieronymus Bosch, The Temptation of St. Anthony

YOUR ARGUMENT IS INVALID, MY HEAD IS A BARN. Also, there is definitely a guy taking a shit on the right side of the painting. That’s fun.

BECCAFUMI, Domenico The Annunciationc. 1545Oil on woodSS....

BECCAFUMI, Domenico

The Annunciation

c. 1545

Oil on wood

SS. Martino and Vittorio, Sarteano (Siena)

James Peale, Anna Claypoole Peale, 1812 (source). James Peale...

James Peale, Anna Claypoole Peale, 1812 (source).

James Peale taught his daughter Anna to paint, and she and her sisters Sarah Miriam and Margaretta Angelica all became successful artists in their own right. Anna sold her first paintings at fourteen, had her first piece in a major exhibition at 20, and she and Sarah Miriam became the first women to be elected members of the Pennsylvania Academy of the Fine Arts. See a portrait miniature she painted of her father James around 10 years after he painted this portrait here.

Charles Willson Peale, James Peale Painting a Miniature, c.1795...

Charles Willson Peale, James Peale Painting a Miniature, c.1795 (source).

Charles taught his younger brother James how to paint, and James went on to become a highly accomplished painter of portrait miniatures and still lifes. Many of Charles and James’ children and grand-children also became artists, making the Peale family influential in American art for over a century.

Ever since I started

Ever since I started using HYDROGEN PEROXIDE to get rid of armpit stains, to clean cookie sheets, as a miracle cleaner in my kitchen and bathroom, and to make my own “oxi clean”…I ALWAYS have at least one bottle of the stuff under my kitchen sink, under my bathroom sink, AND in the laundry room. This stuff is amazingly versatile! *Not to mention it makes your dog puke up chocolate or anything poisonous it might eat.

Ever since I started

Ever since I started using HYDROGEN PEROXIDE to get rid of armpit stains, to clean cookie sheets, as a miracle cleaner in my kitchen and bathroom, and to make my own “oxi clean”…I ALWAYS have at least one bottle of the stuff under my kitchen sink, under my bathroom sink, AND in the laundry room. This stuff is amazingly versatile! *Not to mention it makes your dog puke up chocolate or anything poisonous it might eat.

arcimboldo sucks butt

An artist’s personal life doesn’t interest us here at centuries past!

Emile Galle, Pavia (chestnut), 1863-1930 (source).

Emile Galle, Pavia (chestnut), 1863-1930 (source).

Ludwig Thiersch, Autumn at Konigssee, 19th century (source).

Ludwig Thiersch, Autumn at Konigssee, 19th century (source).

It doesn't need to be Boss's Day for me to pretend I respect you.

I'm a great cook in that I'm very good at preheating an oven.

I'm honoring you this Boss's Day by spending only half my workday on email, social media, dating sites, and pornography.

Happy Boss's Day to someone who walked into almost as big of a mess as Obama did.

Watching the Yankees offense in the postseason reminds me of how productive I am at work on Mondays.